Today I am thankful for Thanksgiving. We had more of a Thanksgiving weekend than a day, with lots of food, games, family and shopping. Wynn's brother Wade and his family came to spend the holiday with us and they really helped to make it a memorable weekend. Gayla made great gravy, Wade played endless games of football with the boys, and Mckay kept the boys from ever saying "I'm bored." We introduced them to some new games and enjoyed some old, visited Wynn at work, went to see "The City of Ember" and spent time just talking.
This was the first year I was in charge of Thanksgiving dinner, as Wynn was at work that day. I have to say I was pretty happy with the results. I had lots of help from everyone (even Wynn the day before) and we had an impressive meal.
One tradition I didn't think I would get to enjoy this year was my annual Friday shopping, but again Wade and Gayla helped out by staying with my kids so I could leave the house at 5:00 am. I didn't get anything too exciting, but it was fun.
All in all it was a good weekend and I am most grateful for the time to think about and be grateful for all my blessings.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Blessings
The last speaker in church today referenced Elder Eyring's conference talk a few conferences ago where he spoke about writing down every day the blessings you see in your life that day, or something like that. Anyway, I confessed awhile ago to Rebecca that I tried to do this for awhile, but couldn't ever think of anything to write. It's not that I don't feel like I am blessed, I think it's just another instance of that journal mindblank I often experience.
So. My goal now is to write about a blessing each week here on this blog. Hopefully if I have a whole week to think about it I'll be able to remember all those blessings I know I have!
So. My goal now is to write about a blessing each week here on this blog. Hopefully if I have a whole week to think about it I'll be able to remember all those blessings I know I have!
Maddy's FHE Part 2
Today in Primary Maddy had to share what happened in our Family Home Evening last week. I stood by her at the stand but she told it all herself - except when she said "We took a turkey and passed it around..." and I quickly whispered "a picture of a turkey!"
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Split Personality
Maddy was in charge of the lesson for our last Family Night. Monday afternoon I asked her what she had in mind and she told me she wanted to do a fashion show where we all dress up in our best clothes and then we can have a contest to see who is the prettiest and the winner is like the people who get to go back to Heaven. What?! I thought for a few seconds about how I could show how to make that a better idea without squashing her creativity, but then gave up and said no, that's not a good idea and we don't believe just the pretty people get to go back to Heaven.
Her second idea was to pass around a picture of a turkey and everyone could say what they liked about Thanksgiving. We would read a scripture then pass around a picture of Jesus and everyone would say something they were thankful for about Jesus. This one we did and it went very well.
How can these two ideas be in the same brain? I wonder sometimes which side of Maddy is going to win in the end.
Her second idea was to pass around a picture of a turkey and everyone could say what they liked about Thanksgiving. We would read a scripture then pass around a picture of Jesus and everyone would say something they were thankful for about Jesus. This one we did and it went very well.
How can these two ideas be in the same brain? I wonder sometimes which side of Maddy is going to win in the end.
Monday, November 17, 2008
I think I'm going to paint my bathroom orange. Wynn doesn't think this is a good idea. He hasn't told me this but there have been some subtle hints - like his total silence when I showed him the color sample and his opinion that I should leave the ceiling unpainted so the room wasn't overpowered by orange. It's a bright, bold orange called "Maple Leaf." How could I resist that name? I've always wanted a bold-colored bathroom, because I like bold colors but where else can you live with that for an extended period of time?
Anyway, I'll post a picture when I finish painting and everyone can tell me it looks good since I don't expect much validation from the home front!
Anyway, I'll post a picture when I finish painting and everyone can tell me it looks good since I don't expect much validation from the home front!
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Brotherly Love
This is why I like video games. When else can you curl up next to your brother on the couch?
Friday, November 7, 2008
Parenting by the Book
Last week Wynn said he thought we should take a parenting class. Now when Wynn says something like that what he's really saying is "Heather, will you take care of that for me," but good wife that I am I checked out from the library a parenting book I had heard about and read through it last night.
Can I just say I hate parenting books? Who are these people that think they have all the answers for every situation? If I ever read a book that said "Here are some ideas that might work but you know your kids best and good luck" - that's a book I would take seriously. Instead they say the same things everyone knows - don't lose your temper, don't threaten if you can't follow through, give your children choices and let them experience the consequences - but they give it a cool name and act like if you follow their book you'll never make another mistake again. And then they never address what to do if what they say doesn't work. Two examples I was frustrated about in this book: first, when a preschooler won't get ready for preschool/daycare but you don't want to be late for work you are supposed to tell the time they must be ready by and tell them they can get in the car dressed or not dressed, but this is the time you are leaving. At that time you put them in the car in their pajamas if they are not dressed. They are supposed to care about this. What if they don't? I fight with Ella every time we leave the house because she wants to wear her pajamas. Should I just let her wear her pajamas until she cares? That could be years. The book went on to suggest that when your child gets to daycare and they aren't dressed yet you should tell the worker to not let your child participate until they are dressed. Isn't that just passing on the problem?
My second problem was with older kids getting ready for school. You are not supposed to remind them to get ready for school because that would undermine their self-confidence. You are supposed to let them deal with the consequences of being late. Well, if my boys don't get ready on time they miss the bus. I would have to drive them. They would prefer this. The book then says parents aren't responsible for the consequences, but they shouldn't save their children from the consequences the school gives. At my kids' school the consequence for being late is the parent has to sign in the late child. Yes, I can see Ryan rushing extra hard in the morning to escape that dire fate. In the book example at the end the boy realizes if he continues being slow in the morning he risks being held back in school. What? At what school are you held back a grade for lateness? I can actually, after reading this think of some good possible consequences, but I'm irritated that the book never considers that their logic doesn't always follow.
I just had parent/teacher conferences yesterday and Ryan's teacher told me I really need to do more spelling studying with Ryan because he only got an 87% in spelling. This was after I explained we discussed with Ryan that he is responsible for the grades he gets and the effort he puts into it. Apparently she hasn't read this book, because she told me I shouldn't be leaving that up to Ryan. According to the book I'm just supposed to say "Hmm...you got an 87% in spelling. What are you going to do about that?" and leave it at that. Ryan will then learn the consequences of an 87% in spelling, realize he is suffering because it could be higher, and choose to study more. If I could think of a single bad consequence for that grade that might work.
Anyway, this has been a long ranting post and I am hesitate to publish it, but I feel better now. I think the worst part of reading the book was that I did get some ideas that I found useful, despite all its problems. How annoying.
Can I just say I hate parenting books? Who are these people that think they have all the answers for every situation? If I ever read a book that said "Here are some ideas that might work but you know your kids best and good luck" - that's a book I would take seriously. Instead they say the same things everyone knows - don't lose your temper, don't threaten if you can't follow through, give your children choices and let them experience the consequences - but they give it a cool name and act like if you follow their book you'll never make another mistake again. And then they never address what to do if what they say doesn't work. Two examples I was frustrated about in this book: first, when a preschooler won't get ready for preschool/daycare but you don't want to be late for work you are supposed to tell the time they must be ready by and tell them they can get in the car dressed or not dressed, but this is the time you are leaving. At that time you put them in the car in their pajamas if they are not dressed. They are supposed to care about this. What if they don't? I fight with Ella every time we leave the house because she wants to wear her pajamas. Should I just let her wear her pajamas until she cares? That could be years. The book went on to suggest that when your child gets to daycare and they aren't dressed yet you should tell the worker to not let your child participate until they are dressed. Isn't that just passing on the problem?
My second problem was with older kids getting ready for school. You are not supposed to remind them to get ready for school because that would undermine their self-confidence. You are supposed to let them deal with the consequences of being late. Well, if my boys don't get ready on time they miss the bus. I would have to drive them. They would prefer this. The book then says parents aren't responsible for the consequences, but they shouldn't save their children from the consequences the school gives. At my kids' school the consequence for being late is the parent has to sign in the late child. Yes, I can see Ryan rushing extra hard in the morning to escape that dire fate. In the book example at the end the boy realizes if he continues being slow in the morning he risks being held back in school. What? At what school are you held back a grade for lateness? I can actually, after reading this think of some good possible consequences, but I'm irritated that the book never considers that their logic doesn't always follow.
I just had parent/teacher conferences yesterday and Ryan's teacher told me I really need to do more spelling studying with Ryan because he only got an 87% in spelling. This was after I explained we discussed with Ryan that he is responsible for the grades he gets and the effort he puts into it. Apparently she hasn't read this book, because she told me I shouldn't be leaving that up to Ryan. According to the book I'm just supposed to say "Hmm...you got an 87% in spelling. What are you going to do about that?" and leave it at that. Ryan will then learn the consequences of an 87% in spelling, realize he is suffering because it could be higher, and choose to study more. If I could think of a single bad consequence for that grade that might work.
Anyway, this has been a long ranting post and I am hesitate to publish it, but I feel better now. I think the worst part of reading the book was that I did get some ideas that I found useful, despite all its problems. How annoying.
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